We Band of Butlers
we few, we happy fewArchive for Awesome Mommy Moments
Awesome Mommy Moments #4
A couple of days ago Monkey had a bit of a diaper rash and so was having what we like to call “happy nakey baby time” in her play pen. After a few minutes she climbed up and was standing on the edge of the play pen looking at me and talking to me. I was talking back when I noticed she had a Rice Krispy stuck to her cheek. I had given her a few to eat as they are awesome first snacks because they almost instantly dissolve (I highly recommend them for first feedings!) so it didn’t surprise me that one had landed on her face. “Silly Monkey,” I said as I nonchalantly wiped the Rice Krispy off her face and onto my pant leg. “You have food on your face.” Hmm, I thought, that Rice Krispy is squishy, she must have chewed it up and spit it out. That’s when I looked behind her in the play pen.
That was not a Rice Krispy on my daughter’s face.
That was not a Rice Krispy on my pants.
That was not a Rice Krispy in her play pen.
That was a poopy.
That was a poopy on my daughter’s face.
My daughter has poop on her face.
I let this news slowly sink in as I stared at her (who was, by the way, roaring with laughter at this new game). I calmly picked her up, carried her to the sink, and dumped boiling water over everything that may have been contaminated rinsed her off. Then I scrubbed every inch of her playpen in boiling water and soap and let it soak in the sink for 24 hours washed off all her toys. The better news? I later found more poopy that I had missed because it was hiding behind her ear – which, by the way, is the same place she keeps crackers, so I don’t know what she was planning on doing with it.
Yummy.
Awesome Mommy Moments #3
I was sitting here at my computer having eaten a snack of a bagel and cream cheese when Monkey came over and was playing at my feet. I gave her a spoon to chew on because she loves chewing on spoons (and banging them on things, they make terrific noises) so the chewing sounds she was making didn’t concern me. Until I looked down. And she had not one, but TWO bagels in her lap because she had apparently found the package, opened it, gotten out two bagels, and was happily munching on one of them.
Oh, and I have good news! My daughter doesn’t choke while cramming bagel down her throat. Also, she likes bagels.
Awesome Mommy Moments #2
So I was changing Monkey’s diaper today and there were these crusty white clumpy globules in it. Something that shouldn’t be coming out of any of my child’s orifices, ever. I freaked out for about 3.2 seconds before I realized it was dried cottage cheese from lunch that had dropped into the giant black hole that forms near her belly button when she sits down.
P.S. I filed this under “food” because I want someone to be searching my site under the “food” label and read this post. Because that would be hilarious.
Awesome Mommy Moments #1
I’ve decided to start a new section on my blog called Awesome Mommy Moments, because there are just some things that only mothers understand. It’s the little things…
Today I kept going around and something on my arm would itch. I’d reach up and scratch and it would stop but then it would randomly start itching/scratching again. I finally lifted up my shirt sleeve. I had a partially digested Teddy Puff dried to the inside of it.
Thanks, Monster Mess*.
*Ari’s new nickname.
Lesson for Today
Never, ever, EVER accidentally not press hard enough on your $7 crappy WalMart diaper pail that was probably designed by drunk chimpanzees because the latch, well…DOESN’T…and end up leaving the lid open after your baby starts eating solids.
NEVER.
EVER.
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